It has been said that self-confidence is the key to a happy, successful life. But how do you get that magic feeling? Where does it come from? How can you hang on to it for more than five minutes?

Some students recently shared their thoughts and feelings about self-confidence with us:

"Self-confidence to me means proving to my self that I can do something well. It*s even better if someone else tells you that you*re good at something, too."

"When people listen to me and pay attention to my ideas, I feel like I*m worth something. When people don*t listen, I feel rejected and unimportant. Listening shows that others care about you,"

"I really feel good when my mom gives me a hug and says, ‘Have a nice day* before I leave the house. Some people might take that for granted, but who knows how long you*re going to have a mom to say goodbye in the morning? Also, one day I was in the store and asked a salesman where to find something, and out of the blue he said, ‘You have a beautiful smile*. For the rest of the day I was happy. These kinds of things have to come naturally and from the heart, but they make all the difference in the way a person feels."

"Respect from my family and friends makes me feel the best. I don*t care if I*m not the best football player, if I don*t get the highest grade on a test, or if I don*t succeed at everything I do. I only care if I tried my best and people respect me for it."

"It seems that self-confidence depends a lot on how people treat us. It*s always nice to hear from others that we*re skillful, loved and appreciated. It*s good to know ,too, that people see us as responsible and worthy of respect. When people point out our strengths, we see ourselves more clearly, like seeing our reflection in a mirror."

"Building Self-Confidence Through Better Communication" helps you think clearly about self-confidence: what it is, how to build it in yourself and how to help others feel better about themselves. Improving our self-confidence requires:

Being listened to

Listening to others

Being appreciated

Appreciating others

Taking responsibility for our behaviour

When these things are part of our lives, we feel good about ourselves and who we can be.